LGBTQ+ Family Counseling Program – Here to walk with you
Finding out about unexpected things relating to our children begins early in parenthood. Some of those discoveries are quite shocking. These discoveries range from things they’ve done wrong to things that bring wonder and delight. All our kids have weaknesses, struggles, and vulnerabilities. The folks at the Lynchburg LGBTQ+ Family Counseling Program are here to walk with you.
When unexpected discovery relates to our kid’s sexual orientation and/or gender identity, we may believe that we’re alone. We may feel shame? We may feel, sadness? We may feel anger? We may feel fear?
Questions that might arise
- Why did this happen?
- How can this be?
- Did I cause this?
When this happens, our minds whirl, looking for the cause. We begin to look through our flawed history as a parent.
- Which of my mistakes caused this?
- Did I work too much?
- Did I not spend enough time with him?
- Did I give too much attention to the other children?
- Was it my yelling?
- Was it my criticism?
- Did I push too hard?
- Did I not push hard enough?
Focus on Compassion
“While it is tempting to focus on causation, I want to resolve this question upfront: the origins of sexual orientation and gender identity are highly complex, multi-factorial, and likely rooted in both nature and nurture. For any one person, it can be impossible to know the exact cause. For this reason, I propose that we shift our focus from causation to compassion. Your LGBT+ loved one, regardless of their age, needs your faithful presence, understanding, and compassion in their life ” (Henson. 2019).